Karate did not only teach me the physical exercise, it taught me many other disciplines that totally transformed my life.

During the karate training we were taught self discipline, self defence and a few weeks later, my confidence started to manifest. Even though I loved sports, I was shy around boys. Now I can challenge both boys and girls in both sports and academics.

Also, as a girl growing up in a traditional African community, I did not know that children had any rights until our gender trainer explained to us that children had rights too and we the girls were entitled to as much rights as boys. Armed with information on relationships, gender related issues and HIV/AIDS, I was ready to stand up against the myths that surround our participation as girls in the affairs that concern us.

At the end of the training, we were passed out as trainers in a colourful ceremony that marked the launch of the Sure Start project. I confidently led my team during the final school demonstration at the Lions Children’s Park, Tororo.

The new members have elected me as their chairperson and junior trainer.
I have gained respect from the girls that I train in my school.

I am determined to stay in school so that I can help other girls.
I thank MIFUMI and Women Win for your continued support to my school and our Karate club.

Awor Sylvia,
MIFUMI Primary School

Then there are jealousies and rivalries among your several mothers as each competes for affection and resources for themselves and their children and her children. Sometimes you get caught between these arguments and fights and wonder what you did wrong to deserve all this.

If it so happens that your mother dies, leaving you with this already absentee father and several step mothers, you will automatically take on all the tongue and physical lashing intended for your mother. But what do you know, you are only a child. You are also most likely to be used as cheap labour by your other mothers.
Your absentee father is nowhere to notice your suffering and you need to bond with him now that your mother is gone.

There are more chances for you as a child to be abused, neglected and denied your basic rights in a polygamous home than with divorced parents.

And if it so happens that you are the oldest of the children and you luckily got an education, you will never enjoy the fruits of your labour as three quarters of your life will be spent raising and educating your numerous siblings. You inherit your father’s sins.

Polygamy has no place in our capitalist times characterized with credit crunches and poverty.

Concern, that despite all efforts put in by both the government of Uganda and Human rights organisations, the girl child is still the most disadvantaged person in the world.

The girl child in Africa has continued to suffer in the hands of cultural biases because what stakeholders are doing is treating the symptoms to the disease. The cause of many of the African child abuses are rooted in our cultures.

A few weeks ago I visited the office of the RDC of Tororo District, Mr. Hashaka S. Mpimbaza and I was moved by how passionately he took on the plight of the children in the district most especially cases of Girl child abuse that flood his desk almost every day (His office has a desk for child abuse).

While a few boast about their cultural values, the rural village girl is crying out for a chance to be a child and grow up to realise their full potential.

Bride Price;
The media have highlighted many pathetic stories of Bride price related child abuse where children as young as 10 have been married off for material gain as little as 500 Ug.shs. This raises a question on whether some adults are really capable of unconditional love.
Some may say they don’t practice ‘Bride Price’ rather exchange gifts.

This does not change two facts;
-That many children get caught up in this exchange of prices or gifts.
-That you will by all means have to take expensive ‘gifts’ whether you have them or have to borrow to keep up appearances (not demanded but expected or insinuated). Worse still today’s Uganda has set a new standard to the ‘gift’ pack that is why we are caught up in a series of introduction meeting each week.

I must commend Atuki Turner of MIFUMI for fearlessly taking on fight for a reform in the Practice of Bride price which mostly affects children. Many who saw the plight of these children cowered away in the shadows.

Bride Price or whatever fancy modified name it goes by today definitely needs a reform.

These include Athletics, football, netball volleyball, Karate for girls, Debate, Music, Dance and Drama, Children’s Congress Art/Crafts and Scouting.

Other behavioural change programs include; Guidance and Counselling,
Sex education and HIV/AIDS during the Presidential Initiative on AIDS Strategy for Communication (PIASCY) Week s

Some Newsletter highlights include:
* MIFUMI donates First Ever Purpose built CFPU
* Protect your children from sexual abuse
* Underlying factors of domestic violence
* A life transformed through economic empowerment
* Draw the line between disciplining and abusing your children

We hope you enjoy reading it!

Our latest newsletter is available and can be found on our website

http://www.mifumi.org/index.php?prgm=mifumi-files&category=11&year=2010

We hope you enjoy reading it!

With best wishes,

MIFUMI

Tel. +256 392 966 282 (office)

BY ELIZABETH AGIRO 
FIGHTING for attention comes naturally for some. They will wear ridiculous outfits and strut along the same street countless times until you notice them. They will talk at the top of their voices so everyone notices them. 

Just think back on every mind-boggling thing people have gotten up to and you will realise they were actually crying out for attention. If there is more than one such person in any community, imagine how much more complicated things would get. 

Enter one who is not used to that kind of life. One who did not have to do anything to draw attention to themselves. “No” was rarely in the vocabulary of those whose help they requested. Imagine how such a person would fare in a polygamous relationship. Not well, obviously. 

So if I am used to having things my way, why would I want to be a half a dozen women awaiting their turn for the man in the home to visit? How often would he come visiting anyway? For how long would he be around before he moved on to number two or three or even number six? He could choose to check on me once every three months. What am I supposed to do in between visits? Who’s supposed to warm my bed? If we are trying for children, this is hardly enough time to hit the target. 

This is not to say that his love and affection will be divided equally. There will always be that one woman who takes up more of his time than the rest of us. Whether this favouritism is earned through merit is much of a debate with some arguing that the favourite is resorting to charms. 

Plus, you can’t rule out jealousy. Human beings are naturally jealous. So no matter how much love you shower on me, I will always wonder how much more you are bestowing on the other five women. I will always wonder how much more you are giving them. 

The stress alone of trying to make everything in my home to your liking is enough to not want to be in such a situation. The absurdity lies in the fact that I would be expected to strive to pamper him for the brief duration of his visit and then let dust collect over the shelves and cobwebs on the marital bed before dusting it off for the next visit. 

And if we already have children, how can I explain your absence to them? They will want to know where their father stays all that time he’s not around. Why does he visit for such a short while and then disappear? How should they address the other women they see in their dad’s company? 

At the end of the day, polygamy’s not worth all the stress. He may provide all manner of material things, but as long as I don’t have his full attention and love, count me out.

http://www.newvision.co.ug/D/9/500/717288?highlight&q=polygamy

The petitioners of a Tororo-based lobby group, Mifumi project, who were represented by 13 people, including a Roman Catholic priest, had asked the court to abolish bride price, arguing that it was degrading and caused domestic violence. 

Petitioners’ reactions 
The petitioners claim women are the biggest losers. According to Turner Atiku, the executive director of Mifumi, the court’s decision was a disappointment and implies that women will continue suffering at the hands of men. 

But she was quick to add: “We may have lost the battle but not the war. We are definitely going to appeal to the Supreme Court.” Mifumi is an NGO which supports the needs of and promotes protection of women and children. The aim of the petition was to liberate women from the chains that they allegedly get into as a result of bride price. 

Atiku says Mifumi is in the process of submitting its notice of appeal, which she hopes will be heard before the end of this year. Although court said the petitioners did not bring any scientific evidence to prove the connection between bride price and domestic violence, Atiku says several articles regarding bride price within the Constitution are unfair to women. 

She cites articles like refunding bride price in case of a divorce and the refusal to bury a woman at her parents’ burial ground if the man did not pay bride price. “Court felt those articles cannot be the basis for abolition of bride price,” Atiku says, adding that Mifumi is looking at legislation where articles in the Constitution regarding bride price that are unfair to women can be outlawed. 

Statistics from the Uganda Law Reform Commission 2007 report reveal that 78% of women continue to experience domestic violence annually. According to the Uganda Demographic and Health Survey (UDHS) of 2006, more than 60% of women aged 15-49 years experienced physical violence, 39% experienced sexual violence, and 16% experienced violence during pregnancy. The report adds that 68% of ever-married women in Uganda have experienced domestic violence. 

With such findings, women activists feel cheated with the recent ruling. The Centre for Domestic Violence Prevention (CEDOVIP) executive director, Tina Musuya, says they are not satisfied with the ruling. 

“If we still have mandatory bride price, it clearly means men and women are not equal as human beings. Bride price devalues women and reduces them to objects of trade,” she points out. 

“Bride price compromises a woman’s freedom and decision-making in her own home. Every time she tries to take a decision, the man and his family will overrule her. This increases her vulnerability to violence and other forms of abuse,” Musuya stresses. 

In support of the petition 
Judge Amos Twinomujuni argues that the practice of bride price violates all the constitutional provisions to give protection to women. 

He also notes that the practice no longer serves any useful purpose in society. “It has now become purely commercialised, highly exploitive and humiliating to women.” 

He notes that the practice of demanding repayment of bride price when a woman opts out of an abusive marriage is unconstitutional and dehumanises the woman. “It portrays her as a chattel that can be sold in a market and subjects her to potential humiliation, cruelty and torture,” the judge points out. 

He compares bride price to a form of slavery. “Bride price subjects a woman to slavery and servitude, making it impossible for her to move out of an abusive marriage long after it has irretrievably broken down. It is high time the custom is abolished and the woman set free.”

http://www.newvision.co.ug/D/9/31/715296?highlight&q=bride%20price

New Vision – 5th April 2010

By Chris Kiwawulo 

MIFUMI held a referendum in 2001 in Tororo District and succeeded in getting a majority vote for reform of bride price.
Many people have come to recognize the negative impacts that Bride Price has on the status of women. These include civil society organizations like Straight Talk, Amnesty International and Action Aid amongst others, who together with MIFUMI formed a round table to tackle Bride Price in May this year.
Religious institutions in the country have also recognized the fact that Bride Price reduces the African woman’s dignity and contributes to poverty. For example the Arua and Tororo district Archdiocese have recognized this in their Synods.
In September 2008, Tororo District passed the Tororo District Bridal Gift Ordinance that prohibits demanding and refunding of Bride Price. Under the ordinance, Bride Price becomes a gift that is freely given and received.
Atuki Turner, the Executive Director of MIFUMI said, “The bottom line is that Bride Price is about the sale of human beings which is totally unacceptable in this post-slavery era. We are re-arming ourselves and will continue to fight for women’s rights. We know that culture is not static as can be seen with FGM. The fight for justice continues. We intend to appeal.”

For more information contact:

MIFUMI Box 274, Tororo. Tel. 0392 966 282